One morning not too long ago, I woke with a heavy heart and decided, like always, to explore what was going on for me. I sat comfortably, feet propped on the ottoman, wrapped in a warm shawl and entered into a chat with the Divine.
I entered the conversation feeling confused and sad about all the violence in our world. The fear seemed so thick that morning, that it rendered a sense of powerlessness. What to do?
So, I said to God, “Help me, I need your Divine guidance! I’m scared and filled with fear and just cannot find any solution. The world seems to have gone mad–so much violence with nations wanting to dominate and destroy other nations. The threat of nuclear annihilation looming over our heads. And then the fighting in the streets, a constant bickering over human rights. The list seems endless and I feel powerless.
“Help! It feels that the only way to survive is to close my heart and I don’t want to live like that, it hurts too much. Help me God, to stay in this fire of deep unrest and to keep my heart open. Help me to recognize the incredible Divine Presence within everyone, especially those who scare me with their ignorance and hate and anger!”
As always happens in these deeper meditations, I sensed God leaning in close and felt the sweet comfort of her Presence as she tenderly wrapped her angel wings around me, pulling me deep into her heart. I rested. I rested, suspended in that place of radiant vivacious Love as she gently whispered, “Sit here with me, sit here and just let it go for now. The answer will come when it comes. You’ve got this, I promise!”
I have no idea how long we sat, I neglected to check the time. But in time the answer came, though not what I expected. I find that I keep wanting that Hollywood-kind-of-miracle to happen. You know, Moses parting the Red Sea and all that.
What did happen was this: I got lost in the warm embrace of Love, my heart opened and filled with compassion, the rigidity in my body dissolved and hot passionate tears streamed down my face. I heard giggling, wild reckless giggling! And realized it was me. I knew I was home.
Listen to the heart, it never lies and will never lead us astray.
The Joy of Surrender
No parting of the sea, no message in the sky, just pure, unadulterated Joy. Joy is an expression of peace within, it is a product of our coming back into the present moment. This movement from the heart is never passive. It is the voice and guidance of our higher selves, of the Divine.
I don’t always receive such emotional clarity, but when I do I listen. What I heard was, “Let go. Surrender to feeling powerless.”
Once I let go, clarity came and the fear dissolved. I recognized that my fear would not stop the craziness, it would not protect me. I realized that what I could do was very powerful–I could stay in my heart and from this awareness, I would intuitively know what I needed to do.
This is true surrendering and, as I said, it is not passive. It is a very proactive approach to getting to the root of the issue, to what is truly going on for ourselves.
After meditating I spent time processing my fear and clearing away more layers of old programming that I’d been schlepping around—old programming that was born out of trauma.
World events triggered the trauma and my nervous system went into fight, flee or freeze mode. Getting quiet and doing my body awareness exercise allowed me to see things as they really are. Yes, lots of crazy fighting was going on, and yes, the possibility of my being hurt physically was present.
Resting in this present moment happens when we let go and trust the flow. This is living life on life’s terms.
What I was reminded of that morning as I floated in the Grace of the Divine was: All is under control! Nothing to do, just be here. Now.
Good to have had that conversation God, thanks! I heard you. I was listening.
A Simple Practice
- I recommend doing this at least once a day. Consider making it a ritual by lighting a candle and diffusing some essential oil such as Believe*.
- Place yourself in a comfortable place with little or no distraction. Have your journal and writing instrument nearby. Sit straight but not rigid.
- Plant the seeds of love and trust by setting an intention to let go of what no longer supports this innate ability to trust.
- Now, do three or more rounds of conscious breathing. This doesn’t have to be formal, simply breathing in and releasing mindfully is adequate. If you’d like more help, check this out: (https://www.leebyrdmystic.com/breath-work-beginner-embodiment-exercise/).
- When ready, listen to this audio guided body-awareness meditation: https://www.leebyrdmystic.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/Body-Awareness-20221216.mp3
Consider journaling your experience: https://www.leebyrdmystic.com/self-inquiry-journaling/